Gimme gimme gimme!!!!

So I experienced kind of a weird phenomenon this week--the urge to binge.  I've binged many times before, but typically I had a specific food that was the target of my binge.  This time, it didn't really matter to me what food it was.  For instance--Tuesday I was cleaning up my kitchen area at work after lunch service and nearly shoved a bunch of leftover chicken tenders in my mouth.  Wednesday I nearly ate a whole box of granola bars after work.  Then last night I was getting Emily a bowl of ice cream and I nearly ate the remainder of the carton.  It scares me how close I have been, and how easily I could fall back into the patterns that used to be, for me, an every day occurrence.  But thankfully, God gave me the strength to quickly throw the chicken tenders in the garbage....stay away from the pantry...put the ice cream back in the freezer...make the decision to stay away once more.  I pray He will continue to help me make the right decision in those hard places.

How long?

So some people--my kiddos mostly--keep asking me, how long are you going to do this for?

When I say forever I think they think I am kidding. 

But that's the plan!!!  Sometimes I wonder if I will even make it through a day, let alone the rest of my life, without sweets.  So I decide (OFTEN) that I am just going to do my best for today.  I pray to God daily for strength to not eat sugar, and because of His grace, He answers and helps me.  I feel like there may be a day in the future where I can maybe have just one piece of birthday cake....just one ice cream cone...but I am not there yet, and I am scared to even consider trying because it has been a tough journey so far and I don't want to have to start all over.

One day at a time, sweet Jesus  :)